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[plague]

Originally posted by Grinder@Feb 2 2006, 11:30 PM
And plague, I didn't quite understand what you said about those two you knew. Please explain it to me...if that's not weird for you.

For some reason they weren't happy with their lives... One day another of them shot himself to head in his own room and that another guy hanged himself two weeks after. Both times nearly everyone in our school was more or less sad.

I don't really even know why I wrote that... Maybe I thought that would make Play to realize something. Or maybe I was just plain stupid, forget.

[Playbahnosh]

Originally posted by Iron_Scarecrow@Feb 3 2006, 04:23 PM
Maybe just a short phone call everyday to make sure she doesn't forget you.

Oh, I'm doing that alright k: I phoned her every single day since last Thursday, and sneaked in some phrases about how I care for her in the talk. And se sends me at least one SMS daily asking how am I n stuff. Maybe I'm pessimistic, but I think she is just doing it because she want to be friendly, and no emotions. But at least I think that if she REALLY wanted to loose me, she could've done it the hard way(avoiding me completly, not answering phone/SMS, telling me leave her alone n stuff), but she is not doing it. Well, this is a situation that I haven't seen, not even remotely. I'm doomed... At least Sunday is closer than yestarday.. Gnnaah I can't bear this waiting :tai:

[Scatty]

Watch out that she doesn't use you like the previous one did. If there're unclear things in a friendship like that, it leaves many ends open...

[gufu1992]

Originally posted by Playbahnosh@Feb 2 2006, 09:07 PM
BOOGER! BOOGERS! BOOGERS!

OMG WTF ia that?
Back on topic:
Err... I don't understand the problem...

[Fruit Pie Jones]

Originally posted by Playbahnosh@Feb 2 2006, 03:04 PM
True FPJ. And yes, there was another thread about me going haywire over Anikó, damn :tai: And you are right with that "can't stop" thing, but I'm at least willing to try. Gabi herself asked me that very question.

I don't want to come across as Mr. Downer, but the "can't stop" thing really raises a red flag. By saying that, she's got an out. If that's an unfamiliar slang term, it basically means that she has an easy way out of any relationship that develops, because if she ends up cheating on you at some point in the future, she can always say, "I told you at the beginning, that's who I am." In essence, she's given you a preemptive "It's not you, it's me."

Originally posted by Playbahnosh@Feb 2 2006, 03:04 PM
uhh, I read in ReamusLQ's sig "You can't achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd." or something like that. Well I'm about to do just that . I will do everything to surface the good left in her and not the bad. If I can keep her for enough time without her noticing it, she will never leave.

It sounds like you're prepared to put a lot of effort into this. That's good. You seem to be looking for a long-term relationship, but can you be sure she's looking for the same thing? You mentioned that she may have been with her current boyfriend for about six months, and in that time she's had seven "temptations." I don't know exactly what constitutes a "temptation," but seven in six months (assuming six months is accurate) doesn't speak well of her long-term potential. Also, you said she's four years older than you, correct? Does this mean that she'll be leaving school well before you will? That's something to consider as well.

Looks like I'm going to be Mr. Downer whether I want to or not. Everything I've said is pure speculation based on very sketchy information, though. In the end, there's no way to predict how things like this will turn out. I wish you luck.

[Playbahnosh]

Originally posted by Fruit Pie Jones@Feb 3 2006, 06:22 PM
...at some point in the future, she can always say, "I told you at the beginning, that's who I am."* In essence, she's given you a preemptive "It's not you, it's me."

...It sounds like you're prepared to put a lot of effort into this. That's good. You seem to be looking for a long-term relationship, but can you be sure she's looking for the same thing?

hmm...now you say that, this is more than to be considered. You certainly got a point there. Maybe she will actually TRY to leave me. But I'm not that easy when it comes to letting something outta my grasp :evil: I'm maybe not a dream bf, but I can show her things that she will never find elswhere that's my only weapon against her leaving. And my ever so nice and caring nature of course, they like that I hope it'll be enough...

But I'm getting worried really, she replys more and more longer or not at all to my PMs... and when we spoke yesterday evening she seemed more stressed, she wanted to put down the phone early... she was not rude or anything, but kinda strange... I'm getting worried...

EDIT: You won't believe this guys. I told you about how the Yahoo! astrology always comes true for me. Now get this(todays horoscope for me):

Daily couples love (by Astrology.com)
Self-exploration can feel pretty risky, especially if some relationship issues are attached to the areas you're trying to explore. Tell your darling you may need a little alone time to work this one out.

Daily singles love (by Astrology.com)
This latest social opportunity may seem too avant-garde for you, but check it out anyway. Prove to yourself that you are comfortable in your own skin, no matter how unusual the situation. It's very attractive.

Daily flirt (by Astrology.com)
Care to walk a tightrope? If you play your cards right today, you'll maintain a delicate balance between your artistic and logical sides. Then you'll create a thing of beauty (even if that thing is just a night on the town).

Daily extended (by Astrology.com)
The consequences of speaking your mind with blunt honesty haven't ever deterred you from telling the truth. So when someone from the past arrives and expects you to be nice, they'll be in for quite the surprise -- especially if the relationship ended because of something disreputable they deliberately did to you. Needless to say, keeping quiet, no matter what the consequences, may be even more difficult for you now. Don't even try. Let 'em have it!

And now hers:

Daily singles love (by Astrology.com)
Someone is pushing you to hurry, but you're not ready yet. Push back -- ever so gently -- and let them know you still have some things you need to figure out. They'll wait for you. You're too important to them.

Daily flirt (by Astrology.com)
Once again, you're the one who wants to put on the brakes. But that's a good thing, at least for the first part of the day. Later tonight, don't be afraid to step on the gas and indulge yourself.

Daily extended (by Astrology.com)
Ready for just one more red-hot dose of passion? Sure, that doesn't sound too hard to take for a sign as sensual and earthy as yours. Of course, you may need to fight off a slew of admirers, including one who actually had the nerve to stand you up not too long ago. Is it time for payback, or are you still interested? Make up your mind now, before they call, because you know they will.

Is this JUST a coincidence? I really doubt it now Damn, I rarely read that horoscope but when I do it always says the truth no matter what....

You don'z believe this do you?

[Scatty]

Sebatianos told you it all in his last post - let her time. Don't ask for anything, be happy with what she's giving. If you ask more you might get an explosion and hard break-up. She seems indeed to need to decide for herself, so don't push her. Be sensitive and wait.

[Playbahnosh]

Don't ask for anything, be happy with what she's giving.

The thing is Scatty, that she is(for the lack of better word) "tormenting" me with this motionless thing. This is worse then if her actually sending me away. She keeps the love in me for whatever reason. She sent me away once on Thuesday, but I guess she won't do it again seeing I'm far too persistent to just "go and don't look back". She knows she has time until Sunday, so I think just uses what time she has to think this over...

I just phoned her, first and last time this day, I took your advice and haven't pushed her too much, but I just ringed her to ask how she is no funny stuff, as you said :angel:

Well that was strange. Not that our latest conversations weren't strange, but still...

She asked more questions about Anikó and our braking-up. I told her that I spoken to Anikó yesterday and we agreed on that our relationship just doesn't work, and we won't harass each other. I said that telling the truth is the best way in the long term.

Here are some cut-outs of today's talk:

...
Á:I know this will work beetween us...
G: Why are you still so sure?
Á: I just know
G: but there is something more needed for this to work...
Á: like...what?
G: like...me?
Á: Well, you'll be back on Sunday and everything will be in place...
G: Ákos...I...I'm still in...a relationship
Á: Not that something like that deterred you earlier... :P
G: *a long sigh*
Á: You see, a relationship in which you already had looked out from seven times, is not a working relationship...
G: Peter trusts me...
Á: And you-
G: And I'm doing this with him...
Á: See?... That's what I'm talking about...you should speak to him...or will you wait until he finds it out?
G: No!...*long silence*...I don't know ...*silence*...everybody else around here thinks we(she and Peter) feel good together...
Á: And who counts? everybody else or you?...
G:...me...*silence*...I don't know...
Á: Hey, I could be the one you stick with, you'll never know
G: I don't know...
Á: I know this will work, you and me...You showed me something that made me sure...
G: what?
Á: well, you sorta...fell in love with me...
G: no...
Á: yes you did. I know what I felt...
G: Those were your feelings...
Á: Hey I know what I did saw...I'm not seeing things and I'm not stupid you know...
G: I never said that....*silence* Hey, aren't you a little over self-confident?
Á: Hey, aren't you a little over self-confident? (on purpose)
G: *long silence* I don't know... *silence*...Oh Ákos I'd really like to exclude that phase(with Peter) out of my life...but I can't...
Á: I'd be the happiest if you could....
...
Á: But you will come back on Sunday, and we could be finally together...
G: *giggles*
Á: We feel ourselves so great together...
G: yeah *laughs* we do
Á: I say it would work beetween us....
G: *sigh*...Ákos...I don't know...I should go now...really...
Á: Okay, if I'm bothering you, I will go...
G: No, no you are not bothering me
Á: cool...
...

After we put down the phone she sent me a PM on my phone: "One more thing...I'm really happy that you called B) thank you "

Now I'm totally lost in one second she behaves like she loves me, in the next she denies it, in the next she looks as she loves me again... now what? :blink:
One thing is getting close. I think I'm about to convice her to tell this thing to Peter, and (hopefully...sorry) leave him. I'm not evil. But I want to be with her that's for sure....

Jeeez, I'm losing it

[Scatty]

It looks simple to me (excuse me if I allow myself little too much, but I think I see all the background details and reasons so clearly, and would like to help).
She doesn't know what she really wants. And you won't be able to let her realise through trying to convince her to your side. This is really something she has to decide for herself, either if you are important to her or if the mask of happy life with her friend is more important to her. And...as long as you're keeping to her, she can't decide because she wants it both, and so she swings to and fro between you and her friend, while not knowing what she actually wants. If this goes on for longer, it might become too much to her and end in some disaster after which neither you nor her friend will see her again, for example she'll flee from you both.
I'm going to say this only once, but have a think on it. You should gather your strength and let her know, firmly, that she has to decide, and that pretty soon, or you'll leave her because she doesn't seem to know if she really wants you, maybe not wanting you really. Tell her that word in word. But I can imagine that you wouldn't want to do that. Either you go through it and do it, and because of the pressure she will entirely decide between you and love or her friend and no love. Or you let it be as it is and you both will remain in unsure state, which will just bother you both until you both get fed up with that one day and go separate ways.

She needs something that speeds her decision up, Play. Something more extreme. And then you'll either lose her or win her forever.

[Sebatianos]

OR she might be just playing with you (maybe even without realising it). There are people out there that simply like the attention. She could be a person that really likes men trying to get her, so she teases them, but she's uncapable of a steady relationship. In that case you can do just about anything, but it won't help.