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#101 | ||
![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Split, Croatia
Posts: 1,028
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Mujo woke up after a wonderfull dreaming on nudistic beach. After awile he found out that his balls get red from sun. So he run home and as he arrived at the entrance he yelled at his wife Fata: "Fata, give me a yogurt!" After he got his yogurt, he run into bathroom and placed yogurt in washbasin and sit on it. Fata wanted to find out what's going on, so she looked inside bathroom through keyhole. And she said: "I could die and still not find out how they fill it!" |
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#102 | ||
![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: ,
Posts: 1,390
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Which is faster, hot or cold. Hot cause you can catch a cold. Aahahahahahahahahahaha Some jokes are really really lame. Three men find a migical slipery dip. This slipery dip will give you whatever you say while you're going down it. The first man goes down and says diamonds, and he falls into a giant pile of diamonds. The second man goes down and says money, and he falls into a giant pile of money. The third man goes down and says wee, and lands in a giant pool of piss. |
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#103 | ||
![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: ,
Posts: 2
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![]() -What is the difference about swedish jokes and ohter ethnic jokes?
+ + + + + -Swedish jokes always base on true events. :P |
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#104 | ||
![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: ,
Posts: 2
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![]() ++++{[(EXAMPLE)]}++++
There was this Norwegian who was on vacation 'over-there' in Florida. All his life he'd wanted to have a pair of alligator-shoes, and now he thought he would finally be able to get around to buying a pair. Gator shoes are of course expensive, and haggling down the price didn't help. Finally the Norwegian yelled out in anger, "Bare behold de elendige skoene dine. Skal det v?re p? den m?ten, skal jeg pinad? leie meg b?t, dra oppover sumpene her, fange meg en alligator og lage skoene selv!!!" (... In English: Just keep your lousy shoes. If that's how it's going to be then I'll just get myself a boat, go out into the swamp, catch a gator and make my own shoes!).. The owner of the store just looked stupidly at him, "Yeah, sure, and give my best regards to the Swedes who're already up there trying to do what you just told me." The Norwegian runs to a boat-rental and gets a boat, then he heads out into the swamp. After a while he finds two Swedes standing up to their knees in the water. Both of them are holding a spear pointed at the water. "det m? v?re svenskene." (that must be the Swedes) the Norwegian thinks. Suddenly there's a movement in the water and an alligator swims towards one of the Swedes. The Swede is standing there like a statue, just waiting for the big gator to get closer. When the gator is close by the Swede stick his spear into the gator, and with a bit of fighting he get's the beast onto the land, where there is a big pile of gators. The Swede turns the gator on his back and examines it's feet, and then finally utters, "Satan ocks?! Inte sko p? den haer heller." (Damn! No shoes on this one either!).. |
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#105 | ||
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![]() On a party in a castle four noble ones meet. Later in the night, when already somewhat more was drunk, a controversy is inflamed about who's family tree is the oldest. A guest proudly: "My family can retrace their family tree up to Karl the Great. And how does that look with you?" - "I'm sorry. Our documents were lost during the Great Tide."
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#106 | ||
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: ,
Posts: 8
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![]() God if I knew you were going to be so sensitive 'bout the joke, i would never have wrote them, well, anyway here's one I hope you wont criticise this one, and hopefully you'll all get it
Mujo and Haso pull over on a gas station, so the guy on the station asks them: -So, wat'll it be, diesel, super 98, maybe? -No just fill it up with water! -- replyes Haso -With water??? -Yes, with water. And he fills the tank up with water. Suddenly Haso gets out of the car and drops a couple of pills into the tank, and they drive off... So the worker tells his boss: -Well boss there were these two guys that came here and asked me to fill theyr tank with water, and I did, and they just dropped some pills into the tank and drew off... So the boss replyed: -Well, the next time they get here ask them if they want to sell these pills for, uh, well for starters, offer them two million $... And a couple of days later, Mujo and Haso return again fill theyr tank with water and drop in two pills, and the worker asks them if they would be willing to sell these pills for 2 million $, and they said yes, so they give them the pills, take te 2 mils and drive off. And Mujo asks Haso: -Bolan, Haso, how are we going to drive now without those pills??? -Well, on gas(propane, or butane probably), like we did all the time!
__________________
Cosmo Kramer: You know you're not supposed to brush your teeth for 24 hours before you go to the dentist. Jerry Seinfeld: I think you're thinking of 'You're not supposed to eat 24 hours before surgery'. Cosmo Kramer: Oh, you gotta eat before surgery. You need your strength. |
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#107 | ||
![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: ,
Posts: 1,390
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#108 | ||
![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: ,
Posts: 1,390
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I'm sorry but I didnt get that one either. How did they drive before if their tank was filled with water and they required gas to drive? |
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#109 | ||
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Well, ok, not everyone has to know German history I soppose. :P He was the first king that united Germany to one entire land. It was splitted to thousands of tiny areas before that were ruled by small barons and dukes. They all fought one with another to conquer the area of their neighbours and their neighbours did the same so the Germany was weak. Karl the Great conquered the entire country and created such united kingdom that became rather powerful. After his death the land became splitted again, though. <_< Until somewhere around end of 18th - beginning of 19th century... Karl the Great lived somewhere around 13th century (don't recall exactly now). |
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#110 | ||
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Shella, Kenya
Posts: 110
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![]() Fun, funnier, LMAO:
What do you call a braincell in a blondes head? - Lonely... <_< How do you make a blondes eyes tingle? - Shine a flashlight in her ear... Why did the blonde have to go to the dentist all the time? - She kept giving her vibrator a blowjob... |
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