In support of the latest game, The Beverly Hillbillies
Hill Billy Letter
Dear Sun:
I am writing this slow because I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most car accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved. I can't send you the address as the last red-neck family that lived here took the numbers with them for their next house so they wouldn't have to change their address.
This place has a washing machine, but the first day I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain, and haven't seen them since. It rained here only twice last week, three days the first time and four the second. About the coat you wanted me to send you, Aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. We got a bill from the funeral home and it said that if we didn't make the last payment on grandma's funeral, up she'd come. About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it's a boy or a girl so I don't know if you're an aunt or an uncle. Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat, some men tried to pull him out but he fought them off and drowned. We cremated him and it took three days to put out the fire.
Three of your friends went off the bridge in their pickup. One was driving and the other two were in the back. The driver got out, he rolled down the window and swam to safety. The other two drowned because they couldn't get the tail gate open.
Aunt Mabel is knitting you some socks. She would have sent them by now but I told her you had grown another foot since she last saw you so she had to knit another one. Not much more news this time, Nothing much has happened.
Love, Mom
P.S. I would have sent you $20, but the envelope was already sealed.
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