«

[Japo]

LOL Kind of MontyPythonish...

[rlbell]

A methodist minister, a catholic priest, and a jewish rabbi pool together to buy a car. The methodist blessed the car. The catholic added some holy water to the bucket, so he could baptise it as he gave it its first washing. The rabbi borrowed a hacksaw from a friend and removed the tip of the exhaust pipe

[Modeus]

Not really funny joke, but it amuses ME, so ill type it:

Once a beggar was walking through the woods, picking berries. Suddenly, he heard a loud voice shout:
- Greetings, poor man! I am Robin Hood, defender of the poor!
- Oh thank god it's you, i've heard about your great deeds!
- Today i have a record, i shot and robbed 10 rich people! Here, have this expensive fur coat i took from the rcih!
- Oh thank you Robin *puts on the fur coat, starts walking away*
- Stop right there, rich bastard! The poor folks are starving, and you are walking around in expensive clothes!
- But Robin, its me ! !
- *shoots the beggar*
Ha-ha ! Got 11 now.


Yeeah i know, but i like it.

[guesst]

So Moses and Jesus are out on the links. They're on the 16th hole with a particularly difficult shot over a large water trap. Jesus lines up his shot and Moses stops him saying, "Are you nuts? Shoot around the lake, you'll never make it over."
Jesus says, "Na, I saw Tiger Woods make this shot. I can make it." He shoots and ends up with a wet ball. "Mulligan," Jesus calls and drops another ball. "If Tiger can make it, I can." He shoots, drops it in the lake again, and calls, "Mulligan. I can make any shot Tiger can."
But when the third ball lands in the drink Moses saysm "Oh, no. You play it where it lays."
So Jesus steps out onto the lake and is walking across the surface looking for his ball in the lake when someone spots him and yells, "Look'it here everybody! This guy must think he's Jesus to be doing that."
Moses yells out, "No, he thinks he's Tiger Woods!"

[FISHCHAIR]

i mannaged to pack in smoking the other day, i got two nicotine patches
of the doctor. i stuck them on my eyes so i couldnt find my cigerets. worked a treat
LOL

[Mighty Midget]

Bill Hicks (something along these lines):
This guy comes up to me and says "yeah, I'm a heavy smoker. I smoke two packs a day".
What's he yappin about, that sissy, I smoke two lighters a day.

[Japo]

The joke about the car reminded me of this. A physicist, a chemist and a computer expert get into a car. They try to start it but the car won't.

The physicist says, "Looks like there's a problem with the spark plugs."

The chemist says, "No, this sound is telling me that the mixture is wrong."

And the computer expert says, "Why don't we just get out and get in again?"





You know, kind of resetting...

Another one. A physicist, an engineer and a mathematician are dared to calculate the volume (cubic metres) occupied by a cow (yes a cow).

The physicist says, "The only thing we must do is weighting the cow and dividing the result by the cow's average density."

The engineer says, "But you have no way of knowing the density. What we must do is submerging the cow in water so that we can see the volume of water displaced."

And then the mathematician says, "Let's suppose the cow is spherical."





Yes, this jokes are kind of geeky. :P

[Free Willy]

guy and girl go to doctor for they no have good sex
doctor say "do it now so i see what rong"
they do it and all like porno film for 25 minutes
doctor say "noting rong go home"
guy and girl come back in one month for they no have good sex again
doctor say "ok do it now so i see if one thing rong now"
again very porno sex and doctor say "noting rong go home"
2 week later this guy and girl back one more time
doctor angry "i dont think you have problem! y you come?"
guy say "it rain we no have car and me parents are home so we need place to sex"

[Grinder]

Ahem.

[a1s]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Grinder @ Jun 28 2006, 03:23 PM) [snapback]240176[/snapback]</div>

Ahem.
[/b]

LOL LOL LOL LOL
:wallbash: you're killing me, say it again! :wallbash:
LOL LOL LOL LOL