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Old 26-08-2007, 11:06 AM   #21
chumloofah
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Two movies on last night that qualify for this thread, I reckon.
My Primary was "Dungeons and Dragons 2: The Elemental Might", and during the adverts there was "Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy".

D&D2 is about an evil sorceror who got cursed to undeath by his dead master for failing at something they don't bother to explain. He gets fixed right at the start of the film, so you might think this means it doesn't matter but it actually does. Evil sorceror finds a gem containing the soul of a dragon god and that makes him really powerful, and even worse it's going to wake up the dragon god. Oh no!

The hero gets the king of whatever kingdom needs saving to get him a party. An attractive lady barbarian, an attractive elf lady wizard, a cleric who isn't around for long and a short, dirty rogue.

The dialogue is bad... It randomly goes off to explain fundamentals of D&D like when hero asks his girlfriend what she's doing she goes off on one about how there are 2 kinds of magic and then goes on to describe them. His girlfriend is a mage, and she's an attractive lady.

Party goes off, and on the way get attacked by a dragon. Dragon kills the cleric, then the rest kill the dragon. They then go on to bitch about evil sorceror's treachery, obviously unaware that an evil sorceror they've never heard of, let alone met, isn't in a position to betray them.

Then the leader, now aware that rushing off to fight a powerful evil sorceror intent on destroying the world might result in some of them getting hurt, asks if they're sure they want to continue. They all agree they do, so they can repay evil sorceror's treachery.

It goes on, we get some crap about ancient mages of tulac imprisoning the dragon god a thousand years ago, but it took a toll and they died out.

Girlfriend gets undead cursed, but she figures out the ancient mages used faith to beat the dragon, so she manages to destroy the dragon god by holding up a small orb.

This is well done, because the ancient mages used faith too and they could only imprison it and even that killed them.

In summary, the acting and dialogue and directing were all muck.

Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy was about a bunch of nurses who go crazy and walk around killing people with automatic weapons in their lingerie. k:
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Old 26-08-2007, 11:29 AM   #22
Mighty Midget
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<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(chumloofah @ Aug 26 2007, 01:06 PM) [snapback]306784[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
Two movies on last night that qualify for this thread, I reckon.
My Primary was "Dungeons and Dragons 2: The Elemental Might", and during the adverts there was "Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy".

D&D2 is about an evil sorceror who got cursed to undeath by his dead master for failing at something they don't bother to explain. He gets fixed right at the start of the film, so you might think this means it doesn't matter but it actually does. Evil sorceror finds a gem containing the soul of a dragon god and that makes him really powerful, and even worse it's going to wake up the dragon god. Oh no!

The hero gets the king of whatever kingdom needs saving to get him a party. An attractive lady barbarian, an attractive elf lady wizard, a cleric who isn't around for long and a short, dirty rogue.

The dialogue is bad... It randomly goes off to explain fundamentals of D&D like when hero asks his girlfriend what she's doing she goes off on one about how there are 2 kinds of magic and then goes on to describe them. His girlfriend is a mage, and she's an attractive lady.

Party goes off, and on the way get attacked by a dragon. Dragon kills the cleric, then the rest kill the dragon. They then go on to bitch about evil sorceror's treachery, obviously unaware that an evil sorceror they've never heard of, let alone met, isn't in a position to betray them.

Then the leader, now aware that rushing off to fight a powerful evil sorceror intent on destroying the world might result in some of them getting hurt, asks if they're sure they want to continue. They all agree they do, so they can repay evil sorceror's treachery.

It goes on, we get some crap about ancient mages of tulac imprisoning the dragon god a thousand years ago, but it took a toll and they died out.

Girlfriend gets undead cursed, but she figures out the ancient mages used faith to beat the dragon, so she manages to destroy the dragon god by holding up a small orb.

This is well done, because the ancient mages used faith too and they could only imprison it and even that killed them.

In summary, the acting and dialogue and directing were all muck.

Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy was about a bunch of nurses who go crazy and walk around killing people with automatic weapons in their lingerie. k:
[/b]
Great to see this, chumloofah k: I was beginning to worry I would be the only one here. Keep them coming

That D&D movie sounds quite fun, actually. Just insane enough to work as entertainment

...and that last one oh man I'd like to see that! That sounds just plain bonkers LOL It reminds me of this movie I watched some years ago, about these strip dancer girls who got enlisted as commando soldiers in a mid-east rescue raid. It was so wacky I couldn't see through the tears of laughter.
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Old 26-08-2007, 12:43 PM   #23
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Quote:
ancient mages of tulac[/b]
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Old 26-08-2007, 05:07 PM   #24
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Quote:
quiet, backwater town named Kaihoro (if you're into the language of the Maori, see if you can spot the pun here).[/b]
Made up by P.J. and the crew in the early stages of shooting the film. "kai" - food and "horo" - town or village. Foodtown. Also the name of a NZ chain of grocery stores. See, I know stuff.
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Old 27-08-2007, 08:01 AM   #25
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I've actually sat through that D&D 2 "film." Sitting through the whole thing was like having a slow-motion aneurysm.

The main thing I remember thinking was, "why did they even have the cleric character?" he lasted what? 10 minutes, for no reason at all, didn't drive the plot forward, didn't provide any exposition, just hung off the edge of the story like a wart.

I did enjoy the horrifically fake looking elf ears though
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Old 27-08-2007, 08:18 AM   #26
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<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(chumloofah @ Aug 26 2007, 01:06 PM) [snapback]306784[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
Maniac Nurses Find Ecstacy was about a bunch of nurses who go crazy and walk around killing people with automatic weapons in their lingerie. k:[/b]
Now that's a good review of a classic movie. Gotta love the k: at the end.

I once watched an amateur parodic D&D movie made by D&D players. Now that was hilarious, but I'm not sure I remember the name right now (The Roleplayers?).
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Old 27-08-2007, 08:34 AM   #27
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I think it was either the roleplayers or the gamers, something like that
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Old 27-08-2007, 09:40 AM   #28
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Yes I think it was The Gamers, thanks:

http://gamers.deadgentlemen.com/
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Old 27-08-2007, 10:36 AM   #29
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<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Tulac @ Aug 26 2007, 02:43 PM) [snapback]306807[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
Quote:
ancient mages of tulac[/b]

[/b]
What is this? I want to know! NOW!
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Old 27-08-2007, 10:42 AM   #30
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<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Tulac @ Aug 27 2007, 12:36 PM) [snapback]307023[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
What is this? I want to know! NOW![/b]
YOU tell US mister!
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