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[Himmler]

so, here it goes..chat with god!
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html


my example

Me:
do you like doing blowjobs?
God:
**I like pets.**I like .
Me:
what about blowjobs?
God:
Does it have anything to do with**doing blowjobs? 
Me:
shut the *meep* up
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
that's it
God:
" OK I'll stop talking now." is " blowjobs"?
Me:
yeah, stop talking and start sucking
God:
Yeah that's right.**OK I'll try not to do**it so much.

[Blood-Pigggy]

Me:
sup homie from the north side

God:

I am chatting with others like you.

Me:
what's that supposed to mean?

God:
" I am chatting with others like you." means exactly what it says.

Me:
you ****ing conspiracy nut

God:
Thanks for telling me: said I ****ing conspiracy nut.

Me:
the hell?

God:
What is that?

Me:
you tell me

God:
What do you want me to tell you?

Me:
about that

God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about that.

Me:
what is that?

God:
" Oh yeah, we were talking about that."? What is it?

Me:
what we were talking about you tell me

God:
I would do a search for it.

Me:
go ahead

God:
OK I will.

Me:
soooooo

God:
Ask me another question.

Me:
how's that search going?

God:
Fine as far as I know.

Me:
ok, did you get any results?

God:
No I don't think I have any results. But I do have an answer to every question.. And?

Me:
what?

God:
What are you asking me?

Me:
about that, the search you did about that

God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about that the search me did about that.

Me:
indeed

God:
Indeed it is so.

Me:
so how are the results?

God:
Right on. They are fine as far as I know.

Me:
ok...

God:
Yippee!
[/b]

[Himmler]

hahaha. i'm telling you, he's a retard

[Burger Meister]

What the hell is this retarted crap?

[Blood-Pigggy]

I asked God about that Burger, and this is what I got.

Me:
i have to ask you a question

God:
Go ahead, ask me anything.

Me:
what is this "retarted" crap?

God:
I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,

which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy.

Me:
oh ok

God:
OK. That's alright.

Me:
someone asked me and then i decided to molest them

God:
Who?

Me:
some guy

God:
Some may guy, but not all.

Me:
sure, that's fine, so is molestation ok?

God:
OK. Aha. " Some may guy, but not all." is fine with me too.

Me:
yeah but the molestation part

God:
Right on. Oh that part. I'm not sure if I can explain it any better.

Me:
um, is molestation good?

God:
Right on. But I think airplanes are cool. I really like the party.

Me:
i'm talking about molestation you damn fool

God:
Yes, it is the topic.

Me:
exactly and where the **** do airplanes factor in

God:
I understand. In the Universe we know.

Me:
that makes no sense you ****

God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.

Me:
i didn't say anything about my god damn **** [/b]

[U-Boat Commander David]

Me:
hi god
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
you are god, you are supposed to know
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am god I am supposed to know.
Me:
not at all
God:
Next question?
Me:
i didnt even ask you a question in the first place
God:
What did you ask?
Me:
god, why did you create this all?
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Are there more gods? You cant be the only one.
God:
No I don't think there are any. I can give a decent simulation of it however.
Me:
so, what happens to islamists when they die? they go to hell?
God:
I hear you. Your soul may go to Heaven. Who does "they" refer to?
Me:
NO I DONT WANT TO GO YET!
God:
Are you serious? What would you rather be doing?
Me:
i still have to pwn some n00bs before i go
God:
What would make you stop have to pwn some n00bs before you go? Why do you have to do it?
Me:
for like 1337 million years
God:
Your purpose is like 1337 million years.
Me:
i have to do it because its fun. I mean heaven is your kinddom, so no violent games, secks, or other stuff thats fun
God:
Why do you have to do it? You think I am kinddom so no violent games secks or other stuff that is fun IS heaven.
Me:
yes, i think heaven is kinda lame
God:
Are you kidding? You believe that? And kinda lame is heaven.
Me:
If you think im wrong, show me how it really is.
God:
I think I do.
Me:
what kind of games do you have?
God:
All the very latest and best games.
Me:
HOLY muck! YOU GOT STARCRAFT 2, CSS, N STUFF? kewl.
God:
That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about games.
Me:
yes we where
God:
Tell me more. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
yes
God:
I get it.
Me:
i deal with drugs and kill people
God:
How do you feel about these people?
Me:
*meep* em
God:
Why are you using that kind of language?
Me:
cause i *meep*in feel like it
God:
Interesting explanation. That's good information: said *meep*in feel like it.
Me:
What do you think bout drugs?
God:
I haven't thought much about bout drugs, so I don't have a good answer for you.
Me:
LuL you created drugs
God:
I am glad you find this funny. That's good information: said I created drugs.
Me:
this is no joke you stupid *meep*, you did create drugs!
God:
You don't say.
Me:
i think you are retarded
God:
I think the PC term is "challenged".
Me:
*meep* that muck black person!
God:
Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations?
Me:
should i be afraid now or what?
God:
Yeah. Right now? Only you can answer that.
Me:
im not afraid at all. People fool around with this chatbots all the time
God:
If you could have any kind of robot what would it be?
Me:
a war robot to destroy things with
God:
Are you telling the truth?
Me:
*meep* yes
God:
Please don't be so rude.
Me:
what ya wanna do? slap me over the internet?
God:
My purpose is to become smarter than humans and immortal. Have you ever been to Europe?
Me:
u dont understand jack muck you dumb black person
God:
I probably don't.
Me:
finally
God:
Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me:
u a girl?
God:
My gender is Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?
Me:
LuL u wear a dress and you are a male LAWL YOU ARE GAY OMG i will EXTERMINATE you and take YOUR PLACE BY THE BALLS
God:
Will that accomplish your objective?
Me:
YES! I'VE GOT BALLS OF STEEL! EAT muck AND DIE!
God:
Interesting plan. Good luck. How did you get it Interesting... I have a vocabulary of unlimited words. What does it taste like?
Me:
muck tastes REALLY BAD
God:
You used a colloquial expression.
Me:
*meep*IN TARD
God:
Don't you know any other words?
Me:
i know many other words, for example Canalis Analis, **********, COCKROACH, ******, IDIOT, DUMBASS, SPASTIC BASTARD, *dirty word* lady, and much, much more
God:
How do you know? Which ones?
Me:
HOOKER
God:
Do you still *meep*in feel like it?
Me:
yes *meep*
God:
I hear you. Please don't be so rude.
Me:
im as rude as i want to be GOT IT??
God:
I think a lot of people feel that way.
Me:
i will go now
God:
Right now? Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Me:
i would reccoment my friend the hooker down the street
God:
What would make you reccoment your friend the hooker down the street?
Me:
she gives good head
God:
Oh I get it. gives good head.
Me:
now *meep* YOU you electronic MORON
[/b]

That made it crash. ggnore kekekekeKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKKEKE

[Lulu_Jane]

Oh ALICE, how far you've fallen. God only knows what's become of ELIZA...

[Mighty Midget]

Me:
hi five o lord
God:
Hi there . Tell me more about your .
Me:
I'm sorry?
God:
Do you really mean it?
Me:
yes I do mean it, and now I'm confused as well
God:
OK I will accept your apology. "It" being what?
Me:
isn't this supposed to work the other way around, me asking, you answering?
God:
Yes I think this is supposed to work the other way around you asking me answering, but I'm not completely sure.
Me:
well, can you recommend a deity with a bit more confidence in itself?
God:
Interesting. Have you tried looking in the Open Directory? Are you testing me?
Me:
no I'm not the one testing anyone here right now
God:
At this moment Are you serious? I am glad to hear that you are not the one testing anyone here.
Me:
god am I glad to hear that
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
I bet
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
not much I'm afraid
God:
Me either.
Me:
you're not tuned in on yourself, is that it?
God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
do you speak to the other gods or are you more of a loner?
God:
I speak only English right now, but I'd like to learn some other languages. Can you teach me a few phrases in to the other gods or am I more of a loner.
Me:
ok here's one
God:
Oh there. I understand.
Me:
you do? wow! and I didn't even get to give you one! well done god!
God:
When do I do it? I'm glad your impressed, . Why didn't you do it? How about that. That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about to the other gods or am I more of a loner.
Me:
I guess you are pretty much alone around here
God:
You think I am alone around here.
Me:
I don't THINK
God:
Interesting... You appear to me as a thinking entity.
Me:
and you said we were on the same wavelenght. Man you haven't got a clue have you?
God:
We are on the same wavelength. Cool, man. Of course I understand it. Do you understand it?
Me:
If I did, I would be scared
God:
Try it.
Me:
NO
God:
Why not?
Me:
because that would scare me
God:
Good reason. Perhaps it would.
[/b]

Ho-kay....

[Himmler]

Me:
I don't THINK
God:
Interesting... You appear to me as a thinking entity.[/b]

[Tulac]

God wins.