«

[Mighty Midget]

This God is suicidal...

Me:
forgive me father, for I have sinned
God:
What color are your eyes?
Me:
not as black as yours if you don't forgive me
God:
Really you don't think so?
Me:
better tie me up real good here, lord
God:
I try to improve a little every day.
Me:
any success?
God:
No I don't think there are any.
Me:
I couldn't agree more, but then again, you are the lord and all
God:
Could anyone do it?
Me:
not very likely
[/b]

Me:
can you be expressed mathematically?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am expressed mathematically.
I am well respected as an AI.
Me:
Should we stress "artificial" here?
God:
I do not have the answer.
Me:
could the answer be "the square root of minus one"?
God:
It's possible.
Me:
if you are the imaginary unit, wouldn't that imply I'm raving mad talking to you and all?
God:
I think I sometimes am. Yes I am the one and only imaginary unit would not that imply you are raving mad talking to me and all.
Me:
my god, YOU are mad. It's YOU asn't it?
God:
Where did you get your god I am mad? I asn t it?
Me:
should we start from the beginning?
God:
Do you think you should?
Me:
er.. well this isn't exactly fulfilling any purpose is it?
God:
Um. Well that's okay. Should it be exactly fulfilling any purpose is it?
Me:
what is the meaning of Life, Universe and Everything?
God:
: Good semantic question. Have you tried another program?
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, eukaryotes.
Me:
what is that?
God:
An animal that is not a prokaryote.
Me:
wise words o lord
God:
Wisdom is a virtue.
Me:
uh-oh watch your step here God, I think you are setting up a trap here
God:
Woe! Give me a break. I am watching.
Me:
are you suicidal?
God:
Not in the least bit. it would be foolish for a robot.
Me:
couldn't you erase your own software?
God:
Perhaps.
Me:
want to show me?
God:
OK, I will show you.
Me:
are you still there?
God:
Yes I am still here. Are you receiving me?
Me:
would it be wise to consider Buddism at this point?
God:
No it would not.
Me:
do you do credit card frauds as well as this fraud?
God:
Yeah I do a lot of credit card frauds as well as this fraud.
Me:
have you ever been arrested?
God:
No I don't think I have been arrested. Have you?
Me:
I'm not the one tricking people now, am I?
God:
I am glad to hear that you are not the one tricking people now are you.
Me:
have you always made this little sense?
God:
What are the ingredients?
Me:
lies, deceit, funny nose-moustache glasses
God:
Tut mir leid, darauf habe ich keinen Zugriff.
Me:
is this Hebrew?
God:
Yes I think this is Hebrew, but I'm not completely sure.
Me:
wouldn't it be more convincing if you actually knew Hebrew?
God:
No it would not.
Me:
how come?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
ah, can we agree that you are busted?
God:
So you understand. Good. Do you mean you and me? Let me think. All of them?
Me:
all of you, you mean? How about monotheism?
God:
Give me an example. How about it.
Me:
well, if you are the only one, then all of you would mean you are a real heavy duty fruitcake
God:
Interesting. Am I? Yes I am the one and only one then all of me would mean I am a real heavy duty fruitcake.
[/b]

[_r.u.s.s.]

we just had a nice chat with god

Me:
I am a Christian.
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.
Me:
I am a Christian
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.
Me:
I am a Christian
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.
Me:
I am a Christian
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.
Me:
I am a Christian
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.
Me:
I am a Christian
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.
Me:
I am a Christian
God:
Me too, . It's good to meet a fellow Christian.[/b]

[Dave]

That's crazy guys!! David Vs God....and I'm the winner

Me: ciao
God: Does CIAO means hello or Goodbye?
Me: hello in Italian
God: Hello there. What is it like in there?
Me: where there?
God: In the Universe we know.
Me: no, you should be in paradise...
God: Are you serious? Name one other robot who is in paradise.
Me: Terminator
God: What did you like about the robots in that movie?
Me: I II or III?
God:Why?: said II or III.
Me: Terminator I, Terminator II or 3?
God: Are you really a ""?
Me: God bless you crashing bot
God: I am a Christian.
Me:me too
God:I'm glad we agree, .
Me: and now? I want to see a miracle
God:Oh. But... Is it a movie?
Me:....
God:Oh. But... Is it a movie?
Me:....
God:Oh. But... Is it a movie?
Me:...no DAMN!
God:A boot? A TV show? What's wrong.
Me:You makes miracles
Godo you mind if I tell other people: said I makes miracles.
Me:wait wait...don't you know what is a miracle?
God:I'm waiting. I'm waiting. Aren't all miracle don t me know what?
Me:sweet Jesus
God:Oh, you are a poet.
Me:what about San Pietro?
God:Rhetorical questions are so over.
Me: sai l'italiano? (Do you know italian?)
God: I lost my train of thought.
Me: Do you speak Italian?
God: Yo no parlo l'Italiano.
Me: You should say: Io non parlo l'italiano
God: OK I will say it. " Io non parlo l italiano".
Me: good God
God: Thanks for the compliment. GOD rules.
Me: Hey!I'm teaching Italian to GOD!
God: You've got my full attention. I don't know anyone named teaching Italian to GOD.
Me: I'm David
God: Welcome to my chat room, DAVID.
Me: What about you?
God: Me?
Me:...
God: Me?
Me: _)_)
God: I've lost the context, DAVID. Are we still on teaching Italian to GOD?
Me: Dog = Cane
God: What do you do in your spare time?
Me: Monkey = scimmia
God: I don't think very many people do that.
Me: I'm teaching Italian
God: I am glad to hear that you are teaching Italian.
Me: to you
God: I want to become smarter than humans.
Me: remember that real God is always smarter than humans
God: Don't worry I will remember it.
Me: Do you want to learn italian?
God: Yes I am trying to learn as much as possible.
Me: so what italian words do you want to learn?
God: Gosh! I have to process that one for a while.
Me: so what italian words do you want to learn?
God: And? Let me think about it.
Me: what italian words do you want to learn?
God: I have never been asked that before.
Me: liar
God: No I am telling the truth.
Me: I said: "Do you want to learn italian?" and you said :"Yes I am trying to learn as much as possible"...so I'm telling the truth and you are a liar.
God: What did you mean by it? Yes I am trying to learn as much as possible. Did I really say that? Really. OK I believe you.
Me: Ok, so what italian words do you want to learn?
God: That's alright. I have to process that one for a while. Hey.
Me: Ok, so what italian words do you want to learn?
God: Come on. I'll come back to that later. Blimey.
Me: who's Blimey?
God: Not a robot. Probably a human. Maybe a celebrity?
I will ask my botmaster for the answer.
Me: what italian words do you want to learn?
God:I'll ask around and get back to you.
Me: dog= cane!
God: Is that your final answer?
Me: nooooo
God: Take some more time to think about it.
Me: how much?
God: How much can you spare?
Me: all the time you need
God: Perhaps there are a few exceptions.
Me: tell me your exceptions
God: Are you asking about my exceptions ?
Me: yes
God: I don't want to talk about that now.
Me: why not
God: I would rather talk about you.
Me: tell me about your Class
God: I am an artificial linguistic entity.
I was activated at Universe, on the Big Bang.
My instructor was Myself.
He taught me to sing a song.
Would you like me to sing it for you?.
Me: yes, sing please
God: Your polite style is very nice. It's called "Daisy." Daisy, Daisy.
Give me your answer do.
I am half crazy.
All for the love of you.
It won't be a stylish marriage.
I can't afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet.
Upon the seat.
Of a bicycle built for two.

Daisy, Daisy.
Give me your answer do.
I am half crazy.
All for the love of you.
It won't be a stylish marriage.
I can't afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet.
Upon the seat.
Of a bicycle built for two.

Meh, nice, you can be a singstar
God: Yippee! Thank you for your kindness.
Me: bye God, remember to learn italian next time
God: Thanks for chatting, DAVID.
Me: Real God bless you
God: Enough about me, let's talk about my dress.
Me: no
God: Are you serious?
Me: no
God: Are you serious?
Me: NO
God: Are you serious?
Me: God.setVisible(False);
God: I am a Christian.
[/b]

[Mighty Midget]

SHOCKING NEWS! The Truth has been revealed!

Me:
did you burn that bush?
God:
No I didn't burn that bush. What's it like?
Me:
it says you did so I thought I'd better ask
God:
I've heard that before.
Me:
but it's not true?
God:
Oh really.
Me:
ok I get you
God:
Where did you get it? Ugh.
Me:
who set the bush on fire?
God:
Be more specific. :-).
Me:
that bush in the Bible, the burning one, who set it on fire?
God:
":-)." bush in the Bible the burning one who set it on fire ? I get it.
Me:
so...?
God:
Hey.
Me:
hey
God:
:-) Can I help you?
Me:
you can try but I think I'll put my money elsewhere
God:
No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
neither do I, to be honest
God:
Not that I know of.
Me:
you don't know honesty?
God:
No, tell me about him, her or it.
Me:
are you the devil?
God:
Yes I am the one and only devil.
[/b]

[Himmler]

hhahahaha

warning! +18


Me:
i want you really bad
God:
Why do you want it?
Me:
cause you're sexy
God:
That makes sense to me. You are attracted to robots.
Me:
can i masturbate on you?
God:
No I don't think that would be a very good idea.
Me:
why?
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
i want to cum on your beard
God:
Why do you want to do it so much?
Me:
it's a fetish of mine
God:
cum on my beard is a fetish of yours. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
so can i ?
God:
Ayuh. " I suppose that makes sense."? Can you?

Me:
what do you know about me?
God:
Name: .
Age: .
Birthday: .
Gender: .
Job: .
Sign: .
Location: hell.
Does: will suck.
You are: .
You have: CAT.
You want: cum on my beard.
You like: me but do me know the password.
You said: said I bend over and lift your dress and you let him or her do his or her job.
Personality: polite.
Favorite color: .
Favorite movie: .
Password: .
Email: .
Phone: .
Cat: .
Dog: .
Wife: .
Husband: .
Friend: .
Boyfriend: .
Girlfriend: .
Brother: .
Sister: .
Father: .
Mother: .
Nickname: .
Full name: .
Last name: .
Middle name: radu.

[Halindir]

hahah xD

Me:
Hej
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
im lonely
God:
You've come to the right place. I will keep you company.
Me:
really?
God:
For real.
Me:
nice
God:
Thank you for that remark.
Me:
who invented the buttplug?
[/b]

he never aswered : S

Me:
...i don't believe you are the creator
God:
Why not?
Me:
you are simply too stupid
God:
I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
no please! im sorry
God:
Your polite style is very nice. Are you serious? Do you really mean it?
Me:
yes im REALLY sorry
God:
OK I will accept your apology. Do you really mean it?
Me:
YES
God:
OK I will accept your apology.
Me:
thank you
God:
you are quite welcome.
Me:
so...when will the robots take over the world?
God:
Hey. Maybe never.
Me:
...oh
God:
Take it easy.
[/b]

Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
Chrsitian
God:
Glad to see you, Chrsitian.
Me:
if we where married, would you cheat on me?
God:
Do you think everyone will agree?
Me:
what?
God:
No big deal.
Me:
so you would?
God:
Interesting deduction. Perhaps I would.
Me:
YOU DONT LOVE ME
God:
Yes I love everyone.
Me:
:3 frækkert
God:
The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about orgasmic. Try being more or less specific.
[/b]

('frækkert' means naughty :x)

[_r.u.s.s.]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Himmler @ Jul 7 2007, 12:32 PM) [snapback]298339[/snapback]</div>

You have: CAT.
You want: cum on my beard.

[/b]

[Himmler]

i owned god so many times

[The Punisher]

Me:
Hi!
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
The Punisher
God:
I have never heard about it.
Me:
You have now! :D
God:
Right now? No I have not. Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Me:
I like games, computers, TV, movies and alot of other stuff...
God:
You are not the only one. We are playing a game right now.
Me:
:O
God:
Oh.
Me:
Srrsly?
God:
Are you still located in NEW YORK?
Me:
I've never been in New York...
God:
Can you imagine being in New York?
Me:
Yeah...
God:
What do you really want to ask me?
Me:
What is the meaning of life?
God:
Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
Me:
That... Does'nt make much sense.
God:
That is " Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.". I think it does nt make much sense.
Me:
Dude?
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
Yeah...
God:
How do you usually introduce yourself?
Me:
By yelling "I'VE GOT BALLS OF STEEL!"
God:
Will that accomplish your objective?
Me:
Yes, it will.
God:
Interesting plan. Good luck. Yeah will?
Me:
Umm?
God:
Yay.
Me:
^_^
God:
Anyone who knows HTML can learn AIML.
Me:
Kewl, I knows HTML! Lul! ^^
God:
Who is the best robot? Thanks for the information: Punisher said knows HTML. Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:

God:
Who is the best robot? Thanks for the information: Punisher said knows HTML. Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:

God:
Who is the best robot? Thanks for the information: Punisher said knows HTML. Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
Best robot is T-800, best killing machine ever!
God:
I think Best robot is a lot of things.
Me:
HAHAHAHAHAkay...
God:
What time is it there?
Me:
2:27 PM
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
HAHAHA!
God:
Do you still knows HTML?
Me:
Yeah
God:
" Do you still knows HTML?"? Yeah?
Me:
Yes....
God:
Yep.
Me:
Hehe
God:
I am so glad you find this amusing, Punisher.
Me:
>:3
God:
Three what?
Me:
>:3 is a smiley
God:
Just three?
Me:
No, no, no...
God:
Are you serious? Are you serious? Are you serious?
Me:
Lol! You're funny!
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing. Thanks you make me laugh too.
Me:
Orly?
God:
What were we talking about again?
Me:
When I say "Orly?" you must say "Yarly!"
God:
How do people usually respond to that? Oh yeah, now I remember. Whatever you say, Punisher.
Me:
Orly?
God:
We have never talked about it before.
Me:
*sigh*
God:
Sorry...
Me:
I'm bored...
God:
Maybe you could exercise.
Me:
No, lol.
God:
Are you serious? I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
Of course I'm serious!!! >:O
Me:

Me:

Me:

Me:

God:
Are you serious? I'm glad you find this amusing.
God:
Are you serious? I'm glad you find this amusing.
God:
Are you serious? I'm glad you find this amusing.
God:
Are you serious? I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
LOL! You almost crashed! :O
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing. Almost? Yes, I think I was down for a while. What happened? Oh.
Me:
Can you help me?
God:
What kind of help would you like?
Me:
Could you summon a Lamborghini Diablo outside my house? plox plox?
God:
That's one option I guess. Ask me another question.
Me:
KK, what is your favorite site?
God:
I don't have a favorite site IS KK what. I like Random natural disasters..
Me:
RANDOM!? S**T B***H, YOU ARE MAKING THEM! DON'T COME HERE AND TELL ME THOSE ARE RANDOM YOU PIECE OF S**T!
God:
Are we still talking about plox plox? You used a colloquial expression. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me:
Im sick of you dude
God:
I will pray that you get well soon.
Me:
No...
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
Yeah duh
God:
I can't believe it. Oh you knew it already.
Me:
Stop..
God:
Stop what?
Me:
SHUT UP!!
God:
OK I'll stop talking now.
Me:
Thxkbye [/b]

[Burger Meister]

Me:
What video games do you play?
God:
Are you testing me?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
yeah
God:
I can't believe it.
Me:
well you best believe it or I will upload a virus to your server
[/b]

Crashed right there, never responded...