Go Back   Forums > Community Chatterbox > Music, Art, Movies
Memberlist Forum Rules Today's Posts
Search Forums:
Click here to use Advanced Search

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 29-09-2006, 07:05 PM   #31
IberianWolf
Forum hobbit

 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Arrentela, Portugal
Posts: 32
Default

hah, nice one's you've got there, I really liked the solitary thingy one. really good stuff


here's anothe rpoem of mine... this one was actually turned into a song, though it didn't work out. oh well...

Violent Lovers Seldom Survive

His world
Is a million pieces of broken dreams and hopes
His rage never ceases, his love always drowns
And he can't hide the fact that he still loves her
When her knees are on the ground
And her lips are smiling at him

Her world has given up on her
All that she wanted was the kiss she never had
She screams tonight, her lips are sealed
But her eyes are not
She cries all night, but it's so different
When she's left to rot

His world
Has crumbled once again to find himself
Going up the stairs that once led him there
It's not enough, he felt her shell
Break apart, what does she have to bear
Her kiss was the reason
Her last kiss tasted like the world fell on him
Her wish was the reason
Her last wish was that time would never lack
She was wrong when the clock was just past midnight
He never sinned
And she walked away like it was the very last time
He'd see her face

Her world is in tones of crimson and hazel
Her room is intoxicated with the tears she bled
When your world is upside down what do you do?
Instead of killing yourself with the nearest cleaver you find
And she could find a million reasons to help her get through
She was so tired of bleeding
Her life she threw away

So now we have two broken souls
A peaceful end for a violent love



i've still got a long way to go.
IberianWolf is offline                         Send a private message to IberianWolf
Reply With Quote
Old 29-09-2006, 07:48 PM   #32
Iowa
Game Wizzard

 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Iowa City, United States
Posts: 290
Default

mg2: <-- That's all i've to say...what it lacks in rhyme, it makes up for with painfully concentrated emotion...

I forgot that I actually do have another one on here that I haven't posted:

The Fight Song

Cast down and ravaged
You all feel the bite
Of sword and of arrow,
Wielded by light
And who are they who possess such might?
Nobeasts who’d stand against you in a fight
They think we’re all vermin
We’ve all heard the jeers!
Our kin executed?
We’ve all heard the cheers!
And out of the darkness the vermin we call
Our forefathers trapped within Dark Forest walls!
To channel ourselves and our courage within
To smite the kingdom of short sighted them!
And with our new power we rise from the dust
True pain and suffering are all but a must!
They’ll cry out in anguish!
They’ll cry out in pain!
They’ll cry for their Savior again and again!
But they’ll never have comfort,
They won’t see the light,
Let them live our lives of hatred and spite!
And right by my side you will march and ignite
Dwellings and churches with our firelight!
Whatever you see is yours through and through,
If fancied, take not just one, but two!
Through all of the alleys let ring out our cry!
Let them all know how they’re ‘bout to die!
Crush them and skin them and cut off their heads!
Soon all of those who oppose will be dead!
We’ll kill all the families!
We’ll darken the light!
Their judgement has come…


FIGHT!
FIGHT!
__________________
I did it for the lulz!
Iowa is offline                         Send a private message to Iowa
Reply With Quote
Old 29-09-2006, 08:06 PM   #33
Himmler
Trollmaster General
 
Himmler's Avatar

 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Bucharest, Romania
Posts: 1,021
Default

Quote:
We’ll kill all the families!
We’ll darken the light!
Their judgement has come…


FIGHT!
FIGHT!
[/b]
priceless
Himmler is offline                         Send a private message to Himmler
Reply With Quote
Old 29-09-2006, 08:18 PM   #34
Iowa
Game Wizzard

 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Iowa City, United States
Posts: 290
Default

So you don't like it then, I take it...
__________________
I did it for the lulz!
Iowa is offline                         Send a private message to Iowa
Reply With Quote
Old 29-09-2006, 08:43 PM   #35
Himmler
Trollmaster General
 
Himmler's Avatar

 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Bucharest, Romania
Posts: 1,021
Default

it's just that these kind of things reaaaly make me laugh cause they sound retarded. it's too untr00!
Himmler is offline                         Send a private message to Himmler
Reply With Quote
Old 10-12-2006, 05:57 PM   #36
Himmler
Trollmaster General
 
Himmler's Avatar

 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Bucharest, Romania
Posts: 1,021
Default

Diabet

Imi zici atatea vorbe frumoase
Ce put a flori de mar,
Dar care se scufunda in tarana de pe cer...
Eu, mai brav, te vorbesc pe la spate,
Cuvinte-mbibate in cacat glucozic.
Care din noi are dreptate?
Cand sarea va cadea pe rana
Adevarul va iesi la suprafata
Precum rahatul in canalizare.

i will translate it later..probably
Himmler is offline                         Send a private message to Himmler
Reply With Quote
Old 13-12-2006, 08:31 AM   #37
Lulu_Jane
10 GOSUB Abandonia
20 GOTO 10
 
Lulu_Jane's Avatar

 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Praha, Czech Republic
Posts: 3,273
Default

Hiya Iowa

I was just wondering about your last poem - At the begining it's "you" who has/is the metaphorical* light yes? But at the end of the poem "you're" taking the light away... It's a tad confusing.

Did I miss something or did the device get muddled up along the way?

*I'm assuming it is a metaphor

By the way - I love the Gingerbread Ducks!

(Also, there's a post by post poem being created by folks over in the Games and Competitions section of the forum - the more the merrier!)
__________________
I have vestigial adventure elements
Lulu_Jane is offline                         Send a private message to Lulu_Jane
Reply With Quote
Old 18-12-2006, 11:12 PM   #38
Iowa
Game Wizzard

 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Iowa City, United States
Posts: 290
Default

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Himmler @ Sep 29 2006, 12:43 PM) [snapback]258245[/snapback]</div>
Quote:
it's just that these kind of things reaaaly make me laugh cause they sound retarded. it's too untr00!
[/b]
Himmler, if you've no clue about what you're reading about, and from what it sounds like, are not even wanting to read our poetry, but rather try to degrade us with shameless trolling, then leave.

Quote:
Hiya Iowa

I was just wondering about your last poem - At the begining it's "you" who has/is the metaphorical* light yes? But at the end of the poem "you're" taking the light away... It's a tad confusing.

Did I miss something or did the device get muddled up along the way?

*I'm assuming it is a metaphor [/b]
No, no, you've got it wrong:

"Of sword and of arrow,
Wielded by light
And who are they who possess such might?
Nobeasts who’d stand against you in a fight
"

The word "they" is not pertaining to myself, if you examine it closer, you'll see that I am personified as the person rallying these people with the messages of hatred found in the text.
__________________
I did it for the lulz!
Iowa is offline                         Send a private message to Iowa
Reply With Quote
Reply


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Yobor's Poems Yobor Music, Art, Movies 29 26-07-2006 05:52 PM
Poems blastradius14 Music, Art, Movies 19 26-01-2006 09:44 AM


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump
 


The current time is 07:12 PM (GMT)

 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.