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Old 18-01-2009, 02:32 AM   #31
Sal
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Ian Freddie..Bullying has been going on since we lived in caves and fought each other for our share of the hunt..It is cowardly,low and mean..No one should have to put up with it..If your teachers counsellors etc can't or won't help..then you will have to start thinking about ways to stop it..Perhaps you might be able to use some of these suggestions..

1.Stop acting like a victim...you have as much right to be here as they do

2.Take some Karate or boxing lessons..NOT because you want to use it to hurt anyone, but because it will give you confidence to stand up to your tormentors..Most reputable Karate instructors forbid the use of Karate techniques outside the Dojo..

3. When my brother was being bullied at school my dad gave him boxing lessons and then invited the worst of the bullies to come to the gym and "have a go" Needless to say he didn't turn up. My brother didn't get picked on again. He never raised a hand to anyone but the creeps that were picking on him were scared !@#less that he might give them a good hiding.

4. Our 3 sons all took Karate lessons from their dad who is an 8th Dan Black Belt. They NEVER used Karate outside the Dojo. They didn't have to because the training made them feel confident that they could handle bullies..My eldest son went to a party when he was 18 and was "bad mouthed" by a drunken lout who drew a knife and threatened to stab him. My son managed to talk him out of it and take the knife away..I have the newspaper clipping about this still..We believe his training helped to turn what could have been a tragedy into a victory for him..

5. Where are your parents in all of this? You certainly don't want them holding your hand 24/7 but you need to talk NOW

6. By the way I think what the 5th Horseman has said rocks...The laxative part is very appealing..Only do it if you feel the need to.By the way most bullies are not too well endowed in the brain department so what 5th says about manipulating them should give you a lot of satifaction..Good Luck
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Old 18-01-2009, 02:57 AM   #32
ianfreddie07
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Hmmm... I'd bulk up first before doing anything that involves fists.

I don't think they sell laxatives in the Philippines. Or it's just not obvious.
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Old 18-01-2009, 09:45 AM   #33
Sal
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See you haven't understood..No bulking up needed...No fists needed..just a change in attitude..Think about it..You don't have to be "the hulk" just smarter than the morons who are hassling you.. and by the way they sell anything and everything in the Phillipines
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Old 19-01-2009, 08:52 PM   #34
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You really don't need to work out or anything, I never did anything that required physical strength and I still got out of school alive (I'm still in school, but yeah). Most often, what helps is a single dramatic act, preferably one that is very embarrassing to somebody who bullies you a lot. This could be something like the groin kick I went with or that Karate invitation thing somebody else mentioned, even the laxative strategy (which I would consider cheating, though) might work.
If everything fails, humor is still the easiest thing. If people insult you, and you think of a great and funny comeback that embarrasses but does not enrage, they will be impressed.

And one more thing: Walking away doesn't work. I've spent 12 years in 4 schools, and I can swear on my life that walking away is useless. In most cases, it makes things even worse because it shows weakness. The thing to do is to stand up to your bullies, and without provoking physical violence.
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Old 19-01-2009, 10:17 PM   #35
ayoeness
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I know I haven't been on the forum for long, and I don't know you at all. But here goes anyways.
I was bullied as well when I was a kid as appearently many others here. :amused:
I would definitly second the Karate idea, revenge is so unsatisfying anyway. And besides that (as mentioned by Sal) if you haven't done it already; talk your parents about it.
Don't underestimate the help they might be able to give you. And if there's nobody else to talk to, it's really just helps to talk about it.

It ended for me after the first nine years of school, because I met people who liked me as I was. So stay yourself (yes it a cliché, but it's true).
Seems a lot of people like you in here, so there should be nothing wrong with that.

And don't worry. Karma's gonna get them all one day.
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Old 20-01-2009, 10:56 AM   #36
ianfreddie07
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Sal, I misunderstood the fist part.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sal
and by the way they sell anything and everything in the Phillipines
Oh, really? I'm a Filipino and I don't know that LOL

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sal
Where are your parents in all of this? You certainly don't want them holding your hand 24/7 but you need to talk NOW
I told my dad this and he told me "Don't mind them", didn't work. Told me to elbow them in the face and not mind getting punished by the disciplinarian. Didn't do it... Didn't have to.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Grinder
Most often, what helps is a single dramatic act, preferably one that is very embarrassing to somebody who bullies you a lot. This could be something like the groin kick I went with or that Karate invitation thing somebody else mentioned, even the laxative strategy (which I would consider cheating, though) might work.
If everything fails, humor is still the easiest thing. If people insult you, and you think of a great and funny comeback that embarrasses but does not enrage, they will be impressed.
So in other words, outwit/outbully the bully? Hmmm...

Quote:
Originally Posted by ayoeness
And if there's nobody else to talk to, it's really just helps to talk about it.
Who do I look for to talk to then?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ayoeness
It ended for me after the first nine years of school, because I met people who liked me as I was. So stay yourself (yes it a cliché, but it's true).
Yeah. I think my new friends will accept me for who I am. A sad fact I see in some Filipinos are that they judge only the outside of their fellow countrymen.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ayoeness
Seems a lot of people like you in here, so there should be nothing wrong with that.
I can't argue with a lot of people liking me.
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Old 20-01-2009, 09:18 PM   #37
Grinder
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ianfreddie07 View Post
So in other words, outwit/outbully the bully? Hmmm...
Outwit, outsmart, outeverything, but not outbully. You want to get respect, not more hatred. Shock and Awe is what you're shooting for.
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Old 21-01-2009, 07:15 PM   #38
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I apparently like many of the nerds here, was picked on alot in school as well. In the 10th grade I was 4foot 8 and weighed 90 pounds. I got physically and emotionally abused constantly I tried all the stuff yall have mentioned.
Tell an authority figure.......No that just gets you marked as a Narc (tattler) and increases the abuse.
Take it.....They will never stop. Statistics show that over 65% of bullies end up serving time for violent crimes as juveniles and/or adults. They never stop... Never If you turn the other cheek they hit that one as well.
Outsmart them. Can work if you are mean enough. Ususally they just hit you harder for using words they dont understand.

fight them. I found this to reduce the abuse the best. Sorry to all you peacenicks, but it dont apply here. Children can be the most vicious and spiteful creatures on Earth. Even if you LOSE you still gain respect. You must stand up to the bullies. As I usta say even if I lose They are gonna know I was there. I didnt fight fair either. I kicked, bit, poked, anything I could do to cause PAIN to them. I lost more than I won but I earned respect from the bullies. Once they learned I would always stand up for myself they found easier prey to pick on. Its no fun to pick on someone that fights back.

Learn how to insult people. Later in my years I was able to reduce some bullies to tears, simply by finding out about their home life (which is usually bad) and then using the facts I found in public insults. The truth hurts quite a bit.
There was this one guy in the mid 80's who just would not stop, he was huge and dumb. So I had a friend find me a bag of MJ and I planted it in his locker and called the cops. Short story he was charged as an adult and served 3-5 in the state Pen. Never bothered me again.

I do not allow anyone to pour abuse on myself or those I love. I would rather get beat up while standing up for myself than get beat up while running.

Last thing if you are not as mean as me or are a pacifist.
ACT CRAZY. I mean twitchy, anxious, talk to imaginary friends, ETC...
Bullies leave crazy people alone because they are scared of the Crazy.

You have alot of differing opinions here, including mine, The reality is what worked for us may not work for you. But Fact is Fact A Bully will bully you until he thinks its not fun or not worth it. You need to cause that feeling somehow in your tormenters. But as Kenny Rogers said in the song "coward of the county" Sometimes you do have to fight to be a man.

Good luck and we are with you in spirit.

PS. Find someone really big and make friends with them. They are great at keeping bullies away.
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Old 22-01-2009, 05:02 AM   #39
AlumiuN
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Well, for me, because I'm a tall, skinny bugger, no-one bothers with even trying physical violence, and for the rest of it a couple of quick, slick comebacks are all that's required. If not, that's when my fist tends to collide with their face at high speed.
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Old 22-01-2009, 07:46 PM   #40
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I'm afraid it's kinda true. The direct solution is confrontation. And the indirect solution is... No there is no other solution AFAIK, :/ please feel free to share if you find it.

Remember what Sarge and others said. You don't need to win any fight, just make them look for easier prey. :/ There needn't be a physical fight, the confrontation needn't escalate. It depends on both your skill and the bully's aggresiveness. (If you've had to endure him you must know whether he's just a rat who likes to abuse, most likely--or a total psycho and potential future criminal.)

I'm afraid the first evil is the education system. Kids are confined without possibility of choosing their company, as if they did something wrong and were sent to jail. All in the name of equality and enlightment? The results speak for themselves. The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Often even parents can't do a thing, no matter how nasty things get for their child.
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