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[Fubb]

Or as we later found out, his name was actually Rueben...hm.

Thas right children, Im doing a review of the movie True Grit. Now if you havn't seen it, turn away, cause this is probably goona contain spoilers.

This is the 2010 remake by the way

The movie starts off with the narration of some chick talking about how a little girl goes on an adventure in the dead of winter to find her fathers killer, some guys who's name i forgot, but we'll call him Bill. He is a Cowboy. This movie is set in the old west, sometime after 1865.

This is Bill, the murderer, in proper cowboy attire.

So the movie begins. This little 14 year old girl who's name i also forgot (we'll call her Lucy) who's got the brains of Einstein and the courage of Rambo, decides she's goona hire a U.S Marshall to help her hunt down Bill. She goes to the local authority and asks around, and finds a man by the name of...Rooster Cockburn (or Reuben)

Lucy, the 14 year old girl

Rooster Cockburn. He's got 'Disgruntled and Drunk' written all over him.

Just before they set off after Bill, who Rooster assumes is hiding wit a gang ran by a guy named ned, they meet Matt Damon. I mean Labeouf. But no one likes french, so for the sake of everyone, Matt Damon played himself in this movie. Matt Damon is creepy. He watches little girls sleep. But he's a Texas ranger so it's all good.

"I was watching you sleep"

Matt Damon and Rooster try to leave Lucy behind because indian territory, where bill has fled, is far to dangerous for a 14 year old girl. But instead of being smart, she chases after them, and soon the due is now a threesome.

uh...moving on.

There are many interesting people in Indian Territory.

Like Bear-Guy for instance.

However, soon into the Journey, Matt Damon, who we all decide is a douche at this point, decides to go off and find Bill on his own. Bill, you see, killed a senator down in Waco, Texas, and Matt Damon has been chasing him ever since. So Matt ditches Rooster and Lucy in a hope to catch Bill first.

Lucy and Rooster on the other hand, happen upon this little cabin in the woods, occupied by 2 'fellers', as they were called in the good ole days. But nowadays we call them 'stupid' because they need to listen to the Law. And they dont.

Either way, Rooster learns that Ned and his gang have been through here, but the feller telling him gets stabbed by the other feller, because he's giving out information not meant to give out. The feller who stabbed his buddy gets a bullet through his head, courtesy of rooster, and the other feller just plain dies slowly. How sad.

So our duo waits, because they know Ned will come back. But someone comes before ned. Matt Damon. And matt damon, upon seeing the dead bodies, doesn't flee, no, he goes outside and talks to the newly arriving gang of ned. And get's lassoo'd, and dragged behind horses. But rooster's here to save the day, and bam, bad guys die, matt damon is saved, and the trio continue there journey. Again.

Skipping ahead a bit, rooster decides to get drunk on the trip while hunting down neds gang.

"YOU IN THERE NED?!

They got nuthin. Ned and Bill and the rest of the gang have vanished. Another dispute breaks out at camp that night, and once again, Matt Damon decides to leave. Only now we don't think he's a douche. We like Matt Damon again.

The following morning, Lucy go's to fetch water for the still sleeping rooster (theres a pun in there somewhere )

And who does she find also getting water? Uh huh, thats right. Bill. Who not has a bear and stuff. And doesn't resemble a president anymore, not because im too lazy to use photoshop, BUT because he's just that awesome. Ya.

"Come ere and gimmi a big ole hug!

"Ill pass, thanks"

Lucy shoots bill, in the rib, and ned and the gang come and kidnap Lucy, and threaten Rooster that they'll shoot her if he tries to save her.

All looks lost for poor lucy. Ned and the gang leave her with Bill, while they make a run for it. Bill decides he's goona try and kill her. And as he's holding the knife to her throat...The...DAY...IS...SAVED BY MATT DAMON YAY!

"This mah whackin stick"

Meanwhile Rooster is on the plains below the campsight, preparing to take Ned and his gang out.

"IM COMIN' TO KILL YOU!

While this certainly paints the picture for a great ending scene, Rooster is resting his entire life on the hopes that Matt Damon can make a 400 yard shot incase things go sour.

Shut up Lucy, no scoping is out of the question.

AND...Well, the good guys win. Lucy kills Bill, and then falls in a very inconveniently placed pit that has snakes in it, and gets bitten. Rooster leaves matt damon behind to try and get Lucy to a doctor before the rattle snakes poison kills her, and we never here from Matt ever again. Lucy gets her arm chopped off, and we also never here of Rooster again. The end.

Anyways, in my opinion, even though i've never read the book, this was a pretty good movie. I do recomend it. I just wish the ending was different. Cause it just seems kind of silly to me, to have her fall in a snake pit, get bit in the hand and end up having to have her arm amputated, that was my only beef.

Other then that, the story is believable. Its not an action packed western, it focus's on more realistic gun battles, not where the good guys drop 10 guys using only there revolvers. The story isn't rushed either, which is a nice change of pace, considering most movies nowadays go from one place to the next, in no time at all.

Out of 10 stars, i'd give in a 7. Go see it. Actually no, you dont have to, i just told you everything that happens. I saved you money. You can thank me later.

[arete]

the captions! bear guy! whohoohoohahahaha!