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[Expack2]

Granted, but you're forced to eat it with some obnoxious dude who speaks your native language and keeps bragging about his daughter non-stop in such a way that you can't ignore him.

I wish I were an EVO and had control over my actions.

[B-Wolf]

Granted, you are now an E.V.O. (an Electronic Voiced Odometer) and have complete control over your actions.

I wish that there was a fruit that was the color blue.

[mrpeople1984]

Granted, but it gives you terrible gas and makes your extremities itch.

I wish that penguin would stop following me.

[B-Wolf]

Granted, you fall into a volcano and the penguin decides not to follow you anymore.

I wish for enough money to purchase 1,000 different video games.

[mrpeople1984]

Granted, but all the cases were mispacked, and you have 500 copies of E.T. for the Atari, and 500 copies of Highlander for the Sega CD.

I wish somebody would pay me with gum.

[Expack2]

Granted, but the 1,000 USD worth of gum you've been paid with is actually pressure-sensitive explosive gum.

I wish I was Gordon Freeman.

[Jironobou]

You are, but you lose your free will and vocal cords to the Gman, and wind up a slave to higher powers.

I wish Twisted Metal came out today like it should have.

[mrpeople1984]

Granted, but it is full of glitches and bugs that proper testing would weed out, you impatient silly person.

I wish I could talk like Sean Connery.

[KrazeeXXL]

Granted, but from now on the only thing you can say, is: "You're the man now dog!".

I wish ppl would watch less TV.

[ReamusLQ]

Wow, I started this 4 years ago and it's still going strong. I feel a bit of self accomplishment now

Granted. In lieu of watching television, people now take to finding their entertainment through the illegal world of Preying Mantis fighting. People neglect their jobs and the whole world goes into an economic down turn.

I wish I still had my original Lord of Destruction CD Case so I could play on B-Net without having to buy a new copy.