The Abandonia Text Adventure - I Forgot the Subtitle
 

This is the Abandonia Text Adventure - I Forgot the Subtitle.

It will have this pattern:
--- post ---
>command(s) in italics

"Description of what happens in quotes and italics."
--- end of post ---
--- next post ---
>command(s) in italics

"Description of what happens in quotes and italics."
--- end of post ---

Important: Before composing a post, just post it, e.g. "Now it's a me - Mario!", then see if you are really the next one, (wait till you are,) then edit your post. This is to prevent waste of time (multiple writing at the same time), excessive writing haste (to be the first and get your post counted) and general confusion (multiple posts that don't correlate). If there is a queue and you have a post in it and don't want to wait, just edit it to display e.g. "[DELETE]", in order that the next player is able to continue and that I know I'm meant to delete your post. I know that this system could lead to the adventure falling asleep (no notification that the next post was edited and possible long queue), but the mentioned problems need to be solved, and so we just have to try something else.

If you want to say something in RIL (real internet life), just write it at the beginning or end of your post without greater-than sign (>) and quotes - should be possible, eh?

For all of you who don't have experience in text adventures and for those who need to remember something or just want inspiration, here is a Guide/How to (if one of you is able to read my mind from half a year ago, I would be pleased if you would tell me which tutorial I had there (in my mind) then. The game subtitle I thought of would be nice too.) And don't forget the default Wikipedia article.

Synopsis of "What happened so far" in the ATA:
Our Hero went from a room down through a trap door. In the below cave he got chased by rock'n'roll because of artifact theft. He was able to escape to the free nature by sacrificing his dwarf. At a river, he entvended (a German-English blend word meaning to steal from a vending machine) a boat. After the mandatory waterfall, our Hero caught a Pikachu. Since he had no more pokeball-esque items left, he run away from the next creature that approached him. An insidious tree knocked him out, and the creature tied him up in a hut while fighting with Pikachu. When our Hero woke up, a child-labouring female missionary converted him to atheism. With his dread fear of what the future holds taken from his now irreligiously strengthened shoulders, he got into an argument with the narrator. In the end, the narrator asked a sphinx-esqe riddle of our Hero."


Now, let's begin - once upon a time in Abandonia:

"You are in an exactly quadratic room with a wooden floor. The walls are white and display a complete lack of doors and windows. There's a carpet lying in the middle of the floor."

>Turn on Flashlight

"At first the flashlight wont turn on, however after a quick shake it flashes on...right into your eyes."

Inventory:
A flashlight (Working)
A plastic bucket full of ¼ Abandollar coins
A hairdryer with power-cord
A cucumber

The blinding torch light causes you to stagger wildly around the room finally to fall heavily upon the floor. It seems the weight of your fall has crushed and killed a rare albino grue who lurked nearby against the wall, patiently waiting for the opportunity to eat you. You should consider laying off those cheeseburgers, fatty-fatty-grue-killer.

>Look

You are in an exactly quadratic room with a wooden floor. The walls are white and display a complete lack of doors and windows. There's a carpet lying in the middle of the floor, on the carpet lies a broken, bleeding and very dead rare albino grue.

Inventory:
A flashlight (Working)
A plastic bucket full of ¼ Abandollar coins
A hairdryer with power-cord
A cucumber

> Look cucumber

Your cucumber is green. Your cucumber also happens to be very long, it is also very hard. Your cucumber has an oval circumference. Hmmmm...

> Look brass lock

You examine the brass lock, the keyhole seems perfect for inserting a very long, hard, oval shaped thing.

> Insert cucumber into lock

Nothing happens. HA HA you thought this would be easy didn't you? As you hang your head in mild self-loathing at your willingness to believe that vegetables can trigger mechanical devices, you notice a leather pouch has fallen from the corpse of the rare albino grue.

Inventory:
A flashlight (Working)
A plastic bucket full of ¼ Abandollar coins
A hairdryer with power-cord
A cucumber

>Examine lock again

"Since the stench of the cheese increased your eyesight, you now notice that the lock is open."

>Open the trap door

"You aren't strong enough to open the trap door."

Inventory:
A flashlight (Working)
A plastic bucket full of ¼ Abandollar coins
A hairdryer with power-cord
A cucumber
A leather pouch
A stinky piece of blue cheese

> Use crowbar on trapdoor

Nothing happens.

> Cry in frustration

Your woefully underused and cheeseburger laden muscles are no match for the sturdy weight of the trapdoor. You throw your head back and scream, "WHYYYYYYYYY?" Tears of vexation roll down your pudgy face. You beat the trapdoor with the crowbar in an effort to calm your ridiculously swirling emotions.

Suddenly the trapdoor swings open - a dwarf pokes his bearded head out, "Why you knocking so loud?" he grumbles.

Inventory:
A flashlight (Working)
A plastic bucket full of ¼ Abandollar coins
A hairdryer with power-cord
A cucumber
A leather pouch
A collapsed crowbar