RAGE - When games attack
 

This is where you can vent if a game is making you cross.

For example -

Dear Deus Ex: Invisible War,

I am really trying to like you, really I am. Your older brother was wonderful, but you, you are just getting worse and worse.

I'm on Liberty Island and you're implying that I should now "go renegade." THANKS A LOT. After following all the threads of your weak and convoluted storyline you now just want me to kill everyone. Which actually sounds like a wonderful idea because none of your characters are personable or morally appealing. BUT NOW YOU WON'T GIVE ME ANY AMMO.

But you know what? Your port to the PC is so terrible that ammo is irrelevant because your mouse control is horrific - I might as well stand in front of people and shoot them in the face, your stupid controls will still find a way to make me miss.


Whatever, screw you. I'll just try and take down the entire illuminati with a god damned crowbar.


Love,
Me xoxo

P.S the only reason I haven't stopped playing you yet is because your big brother was so good. Call it retarded loyalty.

You don't need to go renegade. I never had any problems with the mouse on my PC. I never had any problems with the ammo too, I just used the poison knife and kept hitting people in the back of the head with the baton.

Here's a tip:
Kill or KO anyone with a gun in the game for extra ammo (except when it's not possible), and try to use NPCs to do your bidding. Don't buy anything from the Omar, just kill 'em all.

I can't recall any game that pissed me off. Except due to the fact that my PC won't run it.

Thank you for your advice Kuger :)

Tell you what though, I don't think this thread should be for devolving into discussions about what game is good or bad and why the other person is right or wrong or hints, unless someone asks for them I guess (and there's no game thread for it already).

It's just a place for venting. You know, like the millionth time you get to the castle only to find the Princess morph into Bowser or something.

It took me several years to solve Monsters in my Pocket on the NES... :suspicious:
That was a HUGE rant from time to time...

Knytt Stories pisses me off all the time because all the user made levels are really difficult.

I got halfway through Indy and the Last Crusade, and somehow got stuck on the upstairs floor of the chateau... It wouldn't let me go back down. And I hadn't saved since I got out of the catacombes... :wallbash:

:ranting:

I love Fallout 3, but those fire ant things are just kicking my butt. They keep setting my suit on fire . . .

Stupid Jak and Daxter 2! I'm at the point where I have to press the buttons the wizard shoots up from the basket to "prove my worthiness!". What the heck? I can kick butt in the rest of the game, but I can't get past this little, probably meaningless, spot! You ... make ... me ... want ... to ... toss ... my ... controller ... to ... the ... dog ... and ... throw ... the ... PS2 ... out ... the ... window!

And there's no darn cheat for it, either!

On another note: This one time, at band camp ...

Ninja Gaiden for the NES.

You know it, don't you? The last boss? The one, that if you lose in it, you're thrown back three damned levels.

Once upon a time I played GTA Vice City ...and paid no money to do so. But later I saw a 10,- EUR re-release at the club my mother was in, and where she had to buy something each quarter. She had no interest in the books offered there anymore, but didn't opt out for a long time, though. So this was one of the common what-do-we-buy?!-what-do-we-buy?! visits at the shop at the end of a quarter, to not get sent some random expensive new publication for not buying something within time. So I killed three birds with one stone, and purchased the game. Now the right moment had come to play Vice City again, with walkthrough to do all there is to. Play, play play. Play, play, play. Well, but when I began the mission where the Dodo is spawn the very first time in the game, and approached the spawn point, and the Dodo should appear and fall onto the water from low height ...the common dreaded GTA exception failure! Spawning the Dodo results in an exception failure! That's what you get when you are an honest p(l)ayer! :rolleyes:

I hate it when really enjoyable games start to suck because of one point where you just can't get any further. Take Darkstar One for example. I love the brainless flying and shooting and repetive exploring of star systems. It's all allright to me no matter what the critics say. But what's up with that second flak gun mission? It's too hard, too annoying and just no fun after a million or so tries. It made me mad, and then sad. Now I try not to think about it anymore, and here I just failed.

Same goes for the final level of Psychonauts. It's an awesome and brilliant game, but damn that last burning fence at the top of the final circus tent. I will try that one again soon, but my nerves are not yet cooled down enough.

Rainbow Six 3 is damn hard, to the point of pissing me off when some dude sneaks up behind me even though I caused a blitzkrieg where he came from. That, and the stupidity of the hostages. If you can handle those small annoyances, it is actually a damn good game.

Dearest Contract J.A.C.K,

You are too short and the people who play you on multiplayer seem to have severe learning disabilities.

Love, Me.

P.S To be fair though, your ending sequence is one of my favourite ever.

Digging this up to vent some rage.

Dear every frigging RPG ever,

I suck at organising stuff in my inventory. Please give me either more space or less crap to pick up. I am a born hoarder, I can't help picking stuff up. I'm trying to play Fallout and this is killing me.

Yours sincerely,

Me.

Deposit your rarely used items in save furniture.

Dear X-Wing Alliance

I must admit I installed you on my hdd with anticipation. You looked so promising in single player, letting me get a feeling of being someone in the SW universe, destined for glory and fame. Soon, however, this uncomfortable feeling started creeping up on me, that the introductionary missions, training missions if you will, were just there to promise all that would never come. For each mission, it became clearer that the only, and I mean only, thing that would happen, was that you would hand out a poor excuse to have me sitting there taking out more and more enemy fighters, up to the point where it became ridiculous and the entire SW feeling evaporated along with my shields. When I, in a single ship, had to face the entire Empire, I saw through you: You had nothing, no idea, no story to swallow, no nothing. You, my good game, is not a game, but a neverending, terrible joke with no punchline.

Hope not to hear from you again

MM

Medal of honour allied assault. WTF?! I just shoot you 5 times with a thompson MG and you are just sitting stunned on the floor like i smacked you hard in the face or something. they are suppose to be real bullets in that SMG. and the game is supposed to simulate them. instead they act as some rubber bullets. to add an injury to the insult there is not blood. WTF?!?!?!?!!? :omg:

I figured that out now :amused: I started stashing stuff in the lockers at the Brotherhood base.

Well, eventually there's another X-Wing Allience type game which is less known but in my opinion, much better, and it's called X-Wing versus TIE Fighter. If you want a bit tougher AI, or competing with others across a much more stabil connection, then it's your game.

What's so wrong with Steam? I love it.

It never works smoothly for me, and I resent its very existence.

Ah, a lesser-spotted Lulu-rant. :3: All the more valuable for its rarity.... I give it a nine for emphasis, a ten for out-of-the-blue unexpected factor, and a twelve for humorous incongruity. *hugs rant*

Dear Diablo II Desert Dung Beetles,

Please stop killing me, I don't like it. And you are not nice.

Yours Truely,
Spoon.

To all military personnel at the K.A.C.C fuel depot at Spinybed, Las Venturas,

Stop shooting at my NRG-500, I just want to steal the Leviathan with the magnet so I can steal an armored car and re-spray it so I can rob Caligula's Casino.

Yours Truly,
Kugerfang


The mission is bullcrap, there are lots of Securicars near The Strip, so why can't I just steal one?

Use a car stairway to climb over the fence at the containers.

Carl Johnson: "No, I don't want to get the crew caught up in some street level jacking - it could get ugly."
Don't skip the cutscenes, then you get answered exactly your questions.

Dear <strike>Diablo II Desert Dung Beetles</strike>Duriel,

Please stop killing me, I don't like it. And you are not nice. Not nice at all.

Yours Truely,
Spoon.

STEAM is great, STEAM is awesome.

Except for selling UFO.

But otherwise, its great. Your dislike of it, is pointless. You will obey the system!

The fence is too high for the Packer. But anyway, I got it finished by getting the jetpack at the Abandoned Airstrip.

And I did watch the cutscenes. It just seems weird.

Argh, know I have to look how I quickly get to that mission to refresh my memories.

There are no Dodos in Vice City, there's only the Skimmer after you complete the mission "Dildo Dodo".

Well, I finally robbed Caligula's Casino, now to get 100% with all the girlfriends and have some coffee.....

The Skimmer is the Dildo Dodo!

Yes, I know. But, I didn't say the Skimmer wasn't the Dildo Dodo.

Yes, you did. I would recommend any book about syllogistics.

Oh.

This isn't really a game... I would like to rage about my Sony Vaio.\

Why in the hell is the Caps Lock Key bigger than the entire laptop? Okay, maybe it's a bit of an exaggeration but seriously the only keys bigger are the space bar and the enter key... The backspace might be bigger but I doubt it. The capslock is twice the size of the shift key... Normally i NEVER use capslock. To type that I just held Shift. It's a stupid and useless key anyways but it used to never bother me. Now any time I type the letter A I run the risk of contracting CAPS disease. It is time for another Hirsoshima... The Japanese mmust pay for my clumsy fingers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Steam!

Go fcuk yourself.

Bye.

Hmm looks like I'm one of the lucky few who never has any problems at all with steam. I even like it, it's easy and it has nice discounts from time to time.

Dear Mechwarrior 4

Why do you overheat my laptop when I'm in the middle of a mission, but only when I'm doing REALLY well?

Yours sincerely,
AlumiuN
Metallic Marauder of the South-East

Dear Entomorph: Plague of the Darkfall,

You suck. F**k you.

Signed,

Someone more awesome than you.

DAMN YOU SUPER GHOULS AND GHOSTS.
I swear i've been playing this game on and off for 8 or 9 years,
And i still can't finish the level with the ships...
One day that game will fear me.

Alien v Predator 2 mulitplayer -

I HATE YOU.

You're a tease, that is all.

Oh yeah thread, I'm bumping you with my white hot fiery rage and righteous frustration.

Steam, and to a lesser extent, Valve. Yes. I'm talking to you. Every time I hand over my hard earned pennies to you, you just smile and give me the middle finger response.

Seriously, all I want to do is play the Half Life 2 episodes. Is that so hard? First you give me fatal engine errors, and even though my system specs are fine for you and my drivers are up to date (YES THEY ARE STOP SENDING ME MESSAGES SAYING THAT THEY AREN'T) you consistently crash 2 minutes into the intro. I even fiddle with the resolution settings like some poor bugger suggested (YES I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE STEAM) and that works... once.

So again, I do what you want, I re-install my drivers, I re-install DirectX (YES THAT WAS UP TO DATE TOO YOU BASTARD,) and then what do you do? You give me a BSOD. Twice. And then I gave up and thought that I'd rather play Splinter Cell. SPLINTER CELL. I hate Splinter Cell, but I hate it less than you.

It's over. Give me back my Nina Simone albums and you'll find your shirts and toothbrush in a bag on my front lawn. Also, I've changed the locks.

Dear ZhuXian Online,

Thank you for drawing my brothers into your convulted gameworld and corrupting them with your "bots are OK" policy. You took my freedom away, melted our videocard (had to buy a new one, better though), wasted our electricity, and made me and my dad unhappy. Now are you happy?

Cheers,
Ian

Gothic 3, you are just terrible.

I wanted to like you - I spent hours getting patches for you and setting you up properly. I'm sure you're a nice game if I was ever able to play you, but your horribly long load times and atrocious lagging prevented that. Whatever, I could have forgiven you over time, except that I just tried to uninstall you AND YOU CAN'T EVEN DO THAT PROPERLY. I was going to complain that exiting you sucked, because it's generally a courtesy to the player that when they want to quit YOU LET THEM, not make them hang around 5 minutes until you feel like shutting down, but having your uninstall program crash is just embarrassing.

I would hate you, but you're too pathetic to hate.



Funnily enough, I just bought the Painkiller series and if I have the same problems, JoWood, you'd better sleep with one eye open buddy.

Dear UO griefers,

Fuck you. Stealing my shit is one thing, it's all part of the game. Following me around town for 10 minutes afterwards, trying to steal my bandages for no reason except that you want to annoy the fuck out of me is just not cool. It'll work out OK, though, I think, because when I GM my combat skills, you're fucking dead. You hear me? You and all your guildmates are toast. I'll carry your heads around like trophies, and when I get a house, I'll lock them down on the doorstep so all passers by can laugh and say "haha, griefers fucking suck".

Yours hatefully,

Eat shit and die.

Dear Jimmy Pegorino,

FUCK YOU

That is all.

Dear Daggerfall,

PLEASE STOP SPAWNING DAEDROTHS!

FFS I'm at level 1!!!

Thank you,

The Adventurer

Dear UFO: Enemy Unknown -

Please stop sending in masses of UFOs after my Avenger has been damaged, and then withholding your UFOs for a week after it has finished.

Otherwise, you epic win.

AlumiuN

PIKACHUU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoo

Estatica = completely crap combat.
I hate that combat a la AITD.

:rant:

Daggerfall, still...

Vampire Ancient = *hrrrggsss* shockshockshockshockshockshock (I'm on the floor dead by now) shockshockshockshockshockshock -> reload